Tested Hearts
by MaryRussellgrl
Summary: Brass is Sara's father in this universe. Grissom and Sara have a baby who is the best thing that has happened to them, but their happiness is short lived. Grief over a child and paranoid behavior test their hearts.


Grissom was wheeled in to the hospital on a stretcher as I followed blood stained looking on in horror. The crime scene was just like any other except when a crazy man tried to shoot me and Grissom protectively jumped in front of it. I screamed as Grissom fell to the ground with a chest wound. Brass and his men shot the man as I sobbed holding my husband.

Brass calmly took charge calling for help as he put pressure on the wound. I held his hand crying praying he would be okay.

Brass walked in the hospital seeing me standing around looking lost as they took the stretcher away.

"Sara." Brass said, coming over to me touching my arm.

"Will…he live?" I asked, staring in the direction they took him.

"I…don't know." Brass said "Why don't we sit down?"

I blinked looking at him.

"What about Jack?" I asked

"I can call your sitter."

He led me to the waiting area as he went making some calls. People looked at me as I sat looking at the blood on my hands. Brass came back rubbing his face.

"Catherine is going to take the baby." He said

He looked at me noticing the blood.

"You better clean the blood off." He said

I didn't move as he touched my hair.

"Honey?"

I looked at him feeling his hand touch my cheek.

"You need to clean up."

He stood pulling me up taking me to the women's restroom. We sat down for what seemed like hours. The doctor came out looking for us Brass went talking to him. They both looked over at me before talking again.

"Grissom?" I said, walking over.

"Sara, this is Doctor Benson."

I looked at the man before me.

"My husband?"

"Doctor Benson just told me that the bullet missed his heart and that he is coming out of surgery."

"He's alive?" I asked

"Yes, barring any complications he should be all right. We need to monitor him closely."

I watched the man leave then I looked at Brass.

"He's going to be all right."

Brass led me outside towards his car when I stopped. Brass walked over standing in front of me. I put my arms around him putting my face in his shoulder.

"It's okay." He said

"I've never been this scared in my life." I said

"I know, why don't we go get Jack and then you come stay with me?"

I moved back wiping my eyes.

"Okay." I said

He took my hand leading me to his car. We got Jack from Catherine and then drove to his house. He allowed me inside as he carried a diaper bag as I carried Jack in.

"I can get us something to eat." He said

I yawned kissing Jack on the cheek.

"I am really tired." I said

He nodded walking over taking Jack from me.

"It's about time he spent time with his grandpa." He said

"You're tired to."

"Hey, I don't sleep. Besides I never get to see the baby."

I smiled walking over kissing him on the cheek then I went to the spare room. Brass walked into the kitchen with a bottle for Jack. I smiled as I closed my eyes hearing him talking to him.

Brass took his tie off throwing it on the kitchen table as he carried the baby with him to sit in his favorite reclining chair in the living room. He lifted the baby up in his arms to get a good look at him. He could see that the baby had my nose and Grissoms eyes and mouth.

The baby squirmed around as Brass smiled laying him in his arms taking the bottle seeing that Jack knew what was coming as he reached for it.

Brass let him have the bottle watching as the baby drank looking at him. Hours later I rolled over faintly hearing a noise.

"Sara?" Brass called

"Hmm?" I answered, not opening my eyes.

"Hey." He said, rubbing my arm as I opened my eyes looking at him. "I got a call and have to go out."

I sat up alert.

"Is it Grissom?"

"No, just a scene."

"Where is Jack?"

"He's on the couch sleeping."

I rubbed my eyes as he went out. Coming out to the living room I saw Jack lying on his stomach sleeping with pillows around him. Brass walked over kissing my head then he walked out. When the baby woke I changed him then I took a cab over to the house. I showered and changed going to the hospital with the baby. I was allowed into the room Grissom was in. He looked very pale lying in his bed.

I teared up looking at the wires attached to him. I leaned over kissing his cool cheek feeling him move. He slowly opened his eyes seeing me.

"Hey." I said, touching his cheek.

"Hey." He said, blinking slowly.

I sniffed as he moved his head kissing my cheek. We smoothed our cheeks together.

"Where is the baby?" He asked

"He's here with us. I have him in his car seat in the chair behind me." I said

I moved so he could see the baby sleeping in his car seat.

"He was worried about his daddy."

"Are you all right?" He asked

"I'm fine." I said, wiping a tear from my face. "The doctor told me you are going to be okay."

"Good." He said

He went to sleep as I caressed his hair.

It took weeks for Grissom to recover. Grissom held the baby as I got some coffee one day. I smiled as Grissom talked to the baby as if he could understand. He showed him a book about insects on the kitchen island.

"That is a fire ant." Grissom said

"Grissom, he does not understand." I said

He looked at me.

"Sara, if we want him to be intelligent then he needs to learn early."

I put my cup down taking the baby from him.

"I understand, but he has time to learn. If we keep pressuring him to learn he won't."

"I am not pressuring him."

I sighed looking at him.

"All right, but when he turns two then the learning starts." Grissom said, walking out.

"Your daddy is crazy." I said, kissing his head. Jack giggled hitting my mouth with his hand.

"I heard that." Grissom said, in the next room.

"He has good hearing." I whispered

We went to work and went our separate ways. I had a break walking into his office. He looked up from the pile of paperwork on his desk.

"Did you call?" I asked

"He's fine." He said

I nodded closing the door as I walked over. He sat back taking his glasses off sighing.

"Want to help me with paperwork?"

"No, I just stopped to see you."

I sat down on his lap kissing him slowly. He moved back looking at me.

"So did you get any results on the tire?"

I smiled shaking my head.

"Do you always have to talk about work?"

"Sorry."

I played with his shirt.

"What's wrong?" He asked

"I think I should go to day shift."

"Why?"

"Ecklie."

"Sara, he can't do anything."

"I think I should." I said

He looked at his desk as I looked at him.

"No." He said

"Grissom, if I did this then I could be home with Jack in the evening."

"No."

I made him look at me.

"I am doing it."

"Doesn't my opinion matter?"

"Always, but right now I am thinking about our careers."

He rubbed my leg sighing. I kissed him again then I got up looking at him.

"So I will fill out a transfer form and then we can relax."

He slowly nodded looking at me. We got home late exhausted. Grissom went to get the left overs in the fridge as I checked on Jack sleeping in his room. I came out seeing Grissom standing beside his desk looking at our mail.

"He's sleeping. I am going to change." I said

He nodded as I walked to the bedroom. I changed yawning as I walked over sitting on the bed. Grissom walked in seeing me lay back on the bed closing my eyes. He watched me a moment before taking his things off. I felt him come onto the bed. I opened my eyes looking at him as he leaned his head against his hand touching my cheek with his other.

"Hard shift?

I nodded closing my eyes again. He leaned over kissing me moving over me slowly. He moved back as I opened my eyes smiling at him.

"I think we should eat then go to bed." He said

"I'm not really hungry." I said

He kissed me again as I put my arms around his neck. He moved as I yawned making him smile.

"Sorry." I said

"I'm going to get something to eat."

I pouted as he got off me walking to the other room. I crawled over the bed lying down on my side. Grissom went in after eating to check on Jack. The baby stood holding onto the railing looking at his father.

"Come here." Grissom said, picking him up. "We have to be quiet."

He walked into the bedroom looking over at me sleeping on my side.

"There is mommy."

Jack looked at me then at Grissom.

"Ssh." He said, walking over sitting down on the bed holding Jack out so he could stand on the bed. I moved hearing the baby and Grissom.

The next day, Grissom signed off on my transfer to day shift. He looked at the form at his desk as Catherine came in smiling at him.

"I just signed Sara's form." He said, laying on the desk.

"Cheer up, because I have someone to replace her."

"Who?"

"You've never met her. Sophia Curtis. She was a cop and now wants to transfer onto your team."

"Really."

"Mmhmm."

"Okay."

I came out of the locker room seeing Brass walking an attractive blonde my way. They talked as they walked.

"Hey honey." He said, kissing my head.

"How are you doing?" I asked

"Great."

I looked at the woman as she looked at me.

"Oh, this is Sophia Curtis. Your replacement." He said, putting his hand on my arm. "Sophia this is Sara."

"Hello." She said

"Hi."

He squeezed my arm before walking away with her. I could already tell I would not like her. Grissom opened the front door of our house later and I pushed him against the door giving him a kiss he would never forget. He moved back looking at me curiously as my hands went his body slowly.

"What has gotten into you, dear?"

"I just wanted to kiss you." I said, looking at his lips.

"You have never kissed me like that." He said

"Of course I have." I said, moving back from him only to have him pull me back.

"No, I don't recall that ever happening. What is going on?"

I looked at him feeling silly.

"I'm going to check on Jack." I said, moving away from him. He watched me go quickly thinking something was wrong. I brought out a tired Jack wearing his bug pajamas. Grissom smiled at him as the baby rubbed his eyes.

"Want to do a take out?" I asked

"Okay." He said

I gave Jack to him then walked over to the phone dialing. Grissom walked over listening to me order. Jack pointed to me as Grissom kissed his head.

I got off the phone and took Jack from Grissom. Jack put his head on my shoulder as I stopped him from sucking his thumb. Grissom looked at us before disappearing to change. We ate and then put Jack to bed again. Grissom got into bed beside me turning the light off. We laid in silence until he moved over moving my hair back from my neck before putting an arm around my waist kissing my skin making me squirm.

"Grissom!"

"Tell me what's wrong and I'll stop." He said

"No, nothing is wrong!"

He continued to kiss me driving me crazy.

"Stop!" I said

He pulled me to lie on my back and I looked at him.

"Is it me?"

"No."

"Jack?"

"No, nothing is wrong."

He sighed looking at me in the dim light.

"Sara, I am not going to let up on this."

I reached up touching his face.

"Is it something about work?"

"No, can we get some sleep?"

He turned on the light turning back to me. I stared at him as he waited. I sat up looking down at my lap.

"Grissom, I am worried about something."

"Oh?"

I looked at him.

"I am worried about us."

He moved so he was sitting facing me.

"Sara, you have nothing to worry about."

"Yes, I do. She just started working."

He stared at me confused then it came to him.

"You mean Sophia?"

"Yes."

He chuckled touching my hand.

"Honey, you do not need to worry."

"I don't like her."

He leaned over kissing me then he sat back touching my cheek.

"You and I have a great relationship. I would never ruin that."

"I know."

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah." I said, smiling at him a little.

"Let's get some sleep."

"Okay." I said

He laid down pulling me back against him. I stared at the wall across from me thinking. I was gone before he woke. Towards the end of shift I tiredly stood in the police station watching the cops walk around. Brass came over seeing me with a white bandage on my head.

"What happened to you?" He asked, pointing to his head as he walked over. I stood feeling the bandage winching.

"I tripped at a scene."

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah."

He nodded pulling me to his office.

"What are you doing here?"

"Waiting for you."

He closed his door facing me.

"You look tired." He said

"I stayed up late thinking."

"What about?"

I sat down on his couch next to the door.

"I'm just thinking about Grissom and that Sophia woman."

He sat beside me.

"You think Grissom would cheat on you?"

"I don't know. I just have a bad feeling."

He touched my hand.

"Honey, I know that man. He loves you deeply."

"I know." I said, looking down.

"You need to talk to him."

"I did."

"What did he say?"

"Basically the same thing you did."

"Then you have nothing to worry about."

I nodded as he touched my cheek. I moved over hugging him.

"If he did do anything I would have a talk with him." He said

"That's why you are the best dad." I said

He chuckled holding me.

Grissom came home walking into the living room seeing Jack and I sleeping on the couch. He smiled walking over watching us. Jack moved his head on my chest opening his blue eyes looking at Grissom.

"Don't wake mommy." He said, grabbing him.

He looked at me as he held the baby noticing the bandage on my head. His phone went off and he grabbed it looking over at me before walking away.

"Grissom." He said

I moved my head opening my eyes noticing that Jack was gone. I could hear Grissom talking in the kitchen. He came out and I laid back pretending to sleep.

"I can't meet with you. I am home." He said, softly. "We can see each other at the lab."

Jack tried to cover Grissom's mouth. He listened to the person on the other end.

"No, we can't meet. I will talk to you tomorrow."

With that, he ended the call looking at Jack then at me. I laid still feeling his eyes on me. He went into Jacks room closing the door and I moved sitting up looking at the door. When Grissom came out alone he looked over not seeing me. I came out of the bathroom as he came into the bedroom.

"Your home." I said

"I just came in. What happened to your head?" He asked, walking over trying to touch my head.

I moved out of his way walking past.

"Nothing, I just tripped."

He nodded watching me leave the room. I went out aware that he was following me.

"Tripped on what?" He asked

I turned facing him folding my arms over my chest.

"Who were you talking to?"

He opened his mouth as I watched him.

"I was talking to Sophia."

"Why?"

"She wanted to see me."

I nodded looking down.

"Sara, I thought we discussed this." He said, walking over touching my arms.

"Why did she want to see you?"

"She wanted to talk about a case."

"After work in her tub?"

"Sara."

"Grissom, is there something going on?"

He looked at me shocked then he shook his head.

"No."

I stared at him searching his eyes.

"No Sara."

I felt his hand go up my arm then down slowly.

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes, I just don't trust her."

He pulled me in a hug sighing.

"You are the love of my life."

I blinked back tears filling silly for not trusting him. I put my arms around his back closing my eyes.

Later I moved hearing Jack screaming in the next room. Grissom moved hearing it also. He watched me get out of bed and quickly go out. I came into Jack's room seeing that he was on the floor from falling out of the crib.

"You're okay." I said, picking him up seeing he had a small cut on his head. I kissed his cheek carrying him to the bedroom seeing Grissom sit up watching us.

"What happened?!"

"He fell out of the crib." I said

He continued to cry as I looked in the medicine cabinet for some peroxide. Grissom came in taking him from me.

"Ssh." He said, looking at the cut. "Sara, it's not that bad. We can wash it then put the bandage on."

"Okay."

We put the bandage on him then Grissom took him to the living room. I rubbed my head coming out seeing him walk over to the couch with a bottle. He sat on the couch giving the bottle to Jack.

"You can go to bed." He said

"I'll stay up." I said

"Sara, you have to work. Go to bed."

I stuck my tongue out then I walked back into the bedroom.

"Mommy is a grouch." He said, watching his son drink.

Dressed for work in the morning I helped Jack walk a few steps in the living room. He was unsteady, but was getting better. Grissom yawned holding a cup of coffee seeing us come into the kitchen.

"He's learning." I said

Grissom nodded taking a drink of coffee. I let Jack crawl out of the room as I smiled at Grissom looking at his messy hair.

"I have to go." I said

He walked me to the door opening it. I touched his messy hair then I walked out. He closed the door finding Jack looking up at him from the floor.

I went to a scene with one of the other day shift CSI's. Brass walked over to where I was by a window outside.

"What did you find?" He asked

"Prints I think." I said, dusting.

"Grissom called me to make sure you were okay."

I smiled shaking my head.

"You can tell him I am just fine."

"I'll do that." He said, before walking away.

I watched him go then I went back to dusting. I walked to the Tahoe stopping because I felt odd. It passed just as soon as it came and I started walking again.

We got back to the lab and once again I felt odd again. I went into the building telling the other person I would meet them later. Grissom came in seeing me sitting on a chair by the front desk. He got his mail looking at me.

"Sara, what are you doing?"

I looked at him standing slowly.

"I feel off."

"Sick?" He asked

"No, just off."

"What does that mean, dear?"

"I don't know."

He looked me up and down then touched my arm.

"Come to my office."

I followed him going inside as he closed the door looking at me.

"Now tell me what is wrong."

"I don't know, I am just feeling off."

"Off how?"

"Grissom, I don't know." I said

He touched my head and cheek.

"You don't have a fever."

I walked over to his couch sitting down looking at the floor.

"What are your symptoms?"

"Like a flutter in my chest."

He walked over sitting down putting the mail down before touching my wrist looking at his watch.

"Your pulse is fine."

I stood up pacing.

"I feel like I am panicking."

"Sit down."

"I can't." I said, fanning my face with my hand.

Grissom reached out touching my arm pulling me over to sit down. I sat down beside him breathing in and out fast. He took my face in his hands making me look at him.

"Sara, calm down."

"Grissom, what if I am pregnant again?!"

"Do you think you are?"

"This is how I felt the first time."

"We should find out."

I stood again pacing.

"I don't want another baby. We have Jack, that's enough!"

"Sara, we don't know anything yet." He said, standing. "Let's just find out."

I ran into the house after shift paying the sitter then going into the bathroom to do the test. As I waited, I went into the see Jack who was sleeping in his crib. I came back out to look at the test stick. The test was negative. I sat down on the toilet looking at it in shock. The relief going through my body was overwhelming. Grissom came home and I told him. He seemed relieved to.

The next day at work the heart flutter started again. I was alarmed because my heart started to rapidly beat. Grissom came home late hearing Jack crying. He put his things down and walked into his room seeing him standing in his crib.

Grissom picked him up and he stopped crying. He walked into the bedroom seeing that I was sleeping in the bed. He looked at me as Jack put his head on his shoulder. He put Jack down after a while then came in seeing that I was still sleeping on my stomach. He turned on the light looking at me. His hand moved my hair from my face as he leaned over kissing my head. I moved my head to stilling again snoring softly. Grissom sighed then he got up.

He woke hour's later hearing me moving around the room. He sat up noticing I was pale.

"Sara, you okay?"

I stopped moving looking over at him.

"Yes, why?"

"You look pale."

"Oh." I said, moving around again "I don't have time to talk."

He got up following me to the door.

"Becareful." He said

"I will."

He kissed me then looked at me concerned.

"Are you sure you are all right?"

"Yes, goodbye."

He watched me leave then he closed the door feeling something was not right. I worked on the case then took a break. I walked down the hallway to the breakroom stopping as I felt dizzy. I put my hand to my forehead hearing people walking and talking.

Brass was in his office as I knocked. He watched me come in.

"Hey." He said

"Can I lay down in here?" I asked, walking slowly over to his couch.

"Yes, why?"

"I'm dizzy." I said, laying down. He got up walking over to me.

"Dizzy?"

"Yeah, it just started." I said, closing my eyes.

"Do you need to go to the doctors?"

"No, I'm fine." I said

He touched my head then stood up looking at me. As I went to sleep he got his phone out leaving the office.

Grissom came in the building looking around seeing Brass walking over.

"Where is she?"

"My office. I contacted Nelson, her supervisor."

Grissom nodded worried about me. Brass walked with him to the police station. He opened the door shutting it seeing me sleeping still. Grissom knelt down touching my cold cheek.

"Sara?"

I moved my head opening my eyes slowly seeing him.

"Dad called you?"

"Yes, he is worried."

I closed my eyes again breathing in and out slowly.

"I think you should go to the doctor."

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not."

I moved looking at him sitting up.

"I don't need to see anyone."

"You don't feel good do you?"

"Yes, I do feel good!"

"Sara, you are always grumpy when you don't feel good."

"Whatever!" I said, standing with his help. "See fine."

"You can lie all you want, but I know you are not fine."

I rolled my eyes walking out of the room. He followed me into the breakroom watching me get coffee.

"Sara, if you would just listen to me."

I turned looking at him.

"Grissom, I am fine. I was dizzy earlier and now I am not." I said "Just drop it!"

He watched me leave drinking some coffee. Jack was fed and I talked to him when I got home. When Grissom got home I was up watching TV. He walked over sitting beside me.

"I missed you coming to see me." He said

"Well you have Sophia." I said, not looking at him. He looked at me as I flipped channels. I looked at him then back at the TV. He grabbed the remote turning off the TV.

"Sara, I want to help you."

"There is nothing wrong with me." I said

"Something is wrong and it is silly to ignore it. Your dad is concerned to."

I closed my eyes laying my head back.

"Honey, please."

I opened my eyes looking into his.

"I will go."

He smiled touching my cheek. The next day I walked down the hallway seeing Brass talking to one of the day shift CSI's. He waved at him then walked over to me.

"Did you make an appointment?"

"Ah yeah." I said

"Good girl." He said

I smiled waving at him before walking away. Grissom saw me walking towards him at quitting time. I smiled at him as he waited.

"Brass told me you called the doctor."

"Yes, I did." I said, lying.

He got his phone out dialing a number. He glanced at me before looking straight ahead.

"Hello, my wife called to make an appointment. Her name is…."

I grabbed his arm pulling the phone down.

"You didn't?"

I sighed shaking my head. He put the phone back up to his ear.

"I need to make an appointment for my wife Sara Grissom."

I started to walk away only to feel his hand close on my arm.

"Thank you. She will be there."

He hung up looking at me one of his Grissom looks.

"You have an appointment at 10:00 tomorrow morning."

"You're mad at me?"

"What do you think?" He asked

I watched him go to his office shutting the door.

He came home seeing me carrying a sleeping jack in my arms. I looked at Grissom as he walked over looking at me.

"I'm sorry." I said

He leaned over kissing my head then he walked past. I watched him go to the bedroom then I took Jack into his room.

The next day I went to the doctor and was told that I was anemic. I was prescribed to take some vitamins. I phoned Grissom telling him and he seemed pleased.

A week later I was kissing Grissom in his office after shift. He had just come in and I missed him. I moved back searching his eyes.

"So take out later?"

"Sounds good." He said, hugging me.

"Hey, I thought after marriage this stops." Catherine said, coming in.

"Not for us." Grissom said, holding me to him. I smiled putting my head on his shoulder.

"I got the results off Greg." She said, handing him the papers.

He looked at them as I moved back.

"Looks good."

His phone went off as he handed the papers back to her. I smiled at Catherine as she smiled at me waiting.

"Grissom." He said

I stopped smiling when Grissom looked at me alarmed.

"Are you sure?!"

"What's wrong?" I asked

"It's Brass, something happened to Jack."

I gasped taking his arm as Catherine stepped closer.

"Yeah Jim, we will be right there." He said, before hanging up.

"What's happening?" Catherine asked

"Our babysitter took Jack to a park near the house and he was taken."

I just looked at him as he talked to Catherine then he took my hand leading me out. Grissom drove as I rubbed my head thinking about the terrible things that could be happening. We parked outside the park and Grissom grabbed my hand.

"Sara, I don't want you to worry. We will get him back."

"He could be dead!" I said, my voice cracking.

"He is not dead. Okay?"

I took a breath as he nodded. We got out of the car and raced to where Brass and the babysitter were with the empty stroller. I walked around as Grissom talked to them. I walked down the path to the basketball court looking everywhere. Brass walked over putting his hand on my back.

"I won't rest till we find him." He said

"I know." I said, looking at him.

Something near a tree caught my attention. Brass looked over seeing what I was seeing. A blue piece of fabric sticking out of some leaves. I started to run towards it as Brass called out my name running over as well. He blocked my path.

"It's his!" I said

"Sara, let me check it out!"

I looked at him as he backed up. Grissom ran over handing him some gloves. Brass snapped them on walking over slowly. He knelt down as I dug my nails into Grissoms arm. He gently took the leaves off. I tried to see, but he blocked my view.

"What is it?" Grissom asked

Brass didn't move for a few minutes. He redid the blanket then stood getting out his radio.

"Body has been found. I need this area taped off."

I felt like my heart had stopped beating. Grissom left me to walk over only to be stopped by Brass. My body just collapsed onto the court as I shook looking over at the blanket. Grissom came over helping me up. I screamed out my babies name feeling so much pain inside that I collapsed in his arms.

Grissom carried me to the arriving ambulance. Brass ran over watching him gently lay me down on the stretcher then he watched as the two EMT's load me into the back. He talked to them as Brass waited.

"Gil." He called

Grissom turned walking over.

"He was strangled."

Grissom closed his eyes. Then he opened his eyes looking at him in pain.

"I don't want Sara to know anything."

"You got it."

Brass walked away.

I woke up in an ambulance feeling numb. An EMT was working beside me. I noticed the doors were opened still at the park. Cool air hit me as I blinked looking out. Grissom climbed in seeing that I was awake. He touched my hair smoothing it back.

"Hey." He said, gently.

"Where's Jack?" I asked, in a small voice.

"He's being taken care of."

"He needs to be fed."

Grissom looked at the man beside him then at me.

"Don't worry about that now."

"I want to hold him."

"Honey, you can't."

I looked into his eyes seeing he was very sad.

"I'll be right back."

He stepped out of the ambulance seeing Brass walking over. He put his hand on his friends arm. Grissom looked at him with unshed tears.

"Dave took him."

"Good."

"How is Sara?"

"Shock."

Brass nodded.

Grissom came back and I was sleeping. He sat down holding my hand.

I woke in a hospital room. I looked around seeing it was raining outside. The door opened as Brass walked in taking my hand.

"Baby, are you all right?"

"Where is Grissom?"

"He's at the lab." He said, touching my head. "He'll be here soon."

I sighed looking around.

"Honey, I think we should talk."

I looked at him.

"What about?"

He sat on the bed rubbing my fingers.

"About Jack."

"Where is he?!"

"Ssh, it's all right. He had an accident."

"Accident?"

"Yes."

"What accident?"

He looked down then he looked at me.

"I want my baby!"

"I know you do, but you can't just now."

Just then Grissom came in seeing us. I tried to sit up looking at him.

"Grissom, where is Jack?!"

Brass got off the bed looking at him.

"Where is my baby?!"

Brass motioned he would go out as Grissom walked over. He watched his friend leave then he climbed on the bed beside me pulling me against him.

"Sara, listen to me. Jack was found in the park. He is dead." He said, calmly.

I looked at him shaking my head.

"No, he….he's not!"

He kissed my head holding me against him. I realized it was true and he held me as I sobbed. He brought me home the next day and I just laid in bed. Grissom tried to get me to eat, but I would not.

Grissom was notified that the person that killed Jack was apprehended. He sat on the couch in the living room staring at nothing. He felt the grief and the worry over me come out to the surface causing chest pains. It was then that he broke down shaking as he held his head in his hands. He knew he had to be strong for me, but his own heartbreak was great.

The day of the funeral was gut wrenching. Grissom wore a black suit and tie. He walked over sitting on the bed looking at me. I laid on my side looking at the wall with the blankets up against me.

"Sara, you need to get dressed."

I didn't say a thing. He rubbed my arm trying to get me to look at him.

"Sara, please."

I closed my eyes moving to the other side. Grissom sighed getting up walking out.

Grissom stood looking down at the small casket disappearing into the ground in the graveyard. He took a breath as the funeral was over. People hugged him and shared their condolences. He had only the team come back to the house. Grissom came in seeing me sleeping in the bed. He sat down touching my white cheek then he got up going out. Catherine and Brass walked over holding drinks.

"She's sleeping." Grissom said

"Can I talk to her?" Catherine asked

Grissom nodded opening the door for her. Catherine came in looking at me. She was struck at how pale I was.

"Hey Sara." She said, plopping on the bed shaking my arm. I moved blinking seeing her then I laid back down. "You should go out there and say hello."

"No." I said

She watched me move to lay on my back.

"We all miss you."

I sighed looking at her.

"Gil, misses you."

"I can't."

She nodded sadly.

"I can bring you something to eat."

I shook my head.

"Okay."

I watched her leave then I closed my eyes. Catherine shook her head at Grissom as she came out closing the door. He sighed looking down as she walked over.

"There has to be something that can get her out of this." She said

"I don't know what." Grissom said

"Maybe you need to get her away for a while." Brass said

"She won't like that." Grissom said

Half an hour later the door opened as Brass came in with a plate of food. I opened my eyes looking at him as he walked around the bed sitting on the side holding the food looking at me.

"You won't come out and see me so I came to see you."

I nodded looking at the food then at him.

"Hungry?" He asked

"No."

"To bad, it's pretty good." He said, eating with a fork.

I touched his leg and he put his hand over my cold one.

"I keep hearing him cry." I said

"You need to talk about it."

I shook my head looking to the side. He ate more then looked at me.

"Honey, you need to eat."

I moved to Grissoms side feeling his hand touch my back. He had left the plate behind in hopes that I would eat.

Everybody left and Grissom came back in. He climbed into bed to lay beside me. He pulled me over to him. He kissed my neck gently. I moved my head letting him continue.

"Sara, I love you." He said, gently. "We are going to get through this."

The next day Grissom drank coffee in the living room when the bedroom door opened and I came out wearing my pajamas looking at him. He looked at me in silence holding his cup. My eyes teared up and I lowered my head crying. He put his cup down coming to me putting his arms around me. I put my face in his neck as he rubbed my back.

"It's okay." He said "I love you."

He led me to the couch holding me as we sat down.

"We should get away for a while." He said

I moved back wiping my face.

"No." I said

"It isn't good to be here now."

"No."

He sighed looking at me.

"Sara, what do you want?"

I looked at him.

"I…don't know."

He pulled me back against him not knowing what to do.

I went back to work a few days later. Everyone was struck by how frail looking I was. Grissom got me an egg sandwich and during break I sat in the breakroom staring at it as I sat at a table. I looked up seeing Sophia standing at the door looking at me with a bag in her hand.

"Hey Sara."

I watched her walk over looking at me sadly.

"I came in because I wanted to see you."

"Why?"

"I wanted to say I was sorry and talk to you."

I watched her sit down next to me putting the bag on the table.

"I got you this."

"What is it?"

"Look inside."

I slowly opened the bag seeing a small box inside. She watched me open it looking at the necklace.

"It's a charm necklace. It's supposed to give whoever wears it good luck."

I looked at the tiny charms on it then I looked at her.

"Thank you."

She smiled watching me put it around my neck.

"So how are you doing?"

"Not good." I said

"Is there anything I can do?"

I shook my head looking at the sandwich.

"Well, I should go." She said, getting up. "Take care of yourself."

I nodded watching her go. Slowly, I started to pick at my sandwich.

Grissom sat in his office working as I knocked looking in at him.

"Come in." He said

I came in looking around as he sat back in his seat. I stopped in front of his desk as he looked me over.

"Did Sophia give you that?" He asked, motioning to the necklace around my neck.

"How did you know about that?" I asked

"She told me that she wanted to give you something at lunch the other day."

"You…had lunch with her?"

"Yes."

He watched me tear the necklace off my neck throwing it at him before leaving.

"Sara!" He shouted, coming out grabbing me by the arms.

"Let go of me!"

"Sara, nothing happened. I had lunch with her that's all."

"That's enough!"

He sighed pulling into his office before shutting the door standing in front of it.

"What do you think happened?"

I looked down.

"We talked, that is all."

I sniffed looking down still.

"Are you going to leave me?" I asked

He didn't say anything. I wiped my eyes looking at him.

"Just tell me."

He came over to me looking at me.

"What would you do if I said yes?"

My eyes teared up more as I put my hand over my mouth shaking. He watched me run out before he could catch me. I ran to Brass's office seeing he was coming out seeing me.

"Sara, what's wrong?"

I put my head against his shoulder crying. He looked over at his men looking at him and I in surprise. He pulled me into his office closing the door sitting us down on his couch holding me.

"Ssh, tell me what is wrong." He said

"Grissom….is…leaving me!"

"What?!" He said, pulling me back.

"He said…he was!"

Brass touched my cheek.

"Honey, I know he isn't."

"He is!"

"I'll talk to him."

"No!" I said, laying my head against his chest.

He looked at his watch then he sighed holding me.

Grissom looked up as Brass came into his office slamming the door shut.

"You have seen Sara." Grissom said, sitting back in his chair.

"Yes, I have. What are you doing to her?" Brass asked, walking up to the desk.

"I messed up."

"Sara, doesn't need this added stress."

"I know, Jim."

"It is a little late being a father to her, but I have to draw the line. She loves you and I know you love her."

"I do love her."

"Then why are you saying you are going to leave her?!"

"I am not leaving her. I worded what I said wrong. Where is she?"

"In my office sleeping."

"I'll talk to her." Grissom said, getting up.

"No, just leave her for a bit. I have to go to a scene. I'll take her home."

Grissom sat back down rubbing his throbbing head. Brass locked his office door before leaving. Hours later he came back tired. He unlocked his office door coming in seeing I was still on his couch with the blanket over me he put down. He walked over shaking my arm.

"Sara, it's time to go home."

I moved the blanket closer to myself feeling him shaking my arm. I opened my eyes seeing him.

"I'll take you home."

"No, I don't want to go." I said, sitting up.

"I talked to Grissom and he said he loves you."

"No, he doesn't." I said

He sighed touching my hand.

"You can come to my place."

I walked out with him going to his car. His phone went off as he got into the car. I watched him answer it.

"Brass." He said

I looked out again.

"Yes, she is here with me." He said, looking at me. "No, she is coming home with me."

I could faintly hear the voice on the other line.

"Gil, she does not want to see you." He said

I watched him close his eyes listening then he opened them looking at me.

"Here she is." He said, handing the phone out to me.

"No." I said

"Sara, talk to him."

I took the phone putting it to my ear.

"Sara, come home." Grissom said

"I don't have a home." I said

"Honey, I am not cheating on you."

"Then why did you have lunch with her?"

"Because I needed to talk to someone that was not your father. She just listened."

"I don't know what to do." I said, rubbing my head.

"Just come home." He said "Please."

Brass watched me hand over his phone then put my head against his passenger side window. He hung up the phone starting the engine deciding on the best course of action. He parked outside the house leading me to the front door. Grissom opened the door nodding to Brass before leading me inside.

He took me to the bedroom kissing me as he laid me on the bed. I closed my eyes feeling his lips go to my neck. He loved me that night as if it was first time and I knew deep down he did love me.

The next morning he called in saying I was sick then he came back to bed lying beside me watching me sleep. He noted how thin I looked. I squirmed feeling his lips on my bare shoulder.

"Good morning." He said

"Good morning." I said, looking at him.

"We are going to spend the day here." He said

"I work."

"I called in."

I moved to my side kissing him feeling his hands moving along my back.

"I'll make breakfast." He said

"Later." I said "I am in the mood for something else."

"I am to now."

I let him move over me enjoying the morning. We both slept more then got up to eat. Grissom held me against him as we watched TV still in out pajamas. He kissed my head content to be with me.

"This has been a good day." I said

"Mmhmm." He said

"I love you Grissom."

"I love you."

I smiled faintly touching his hand on his leg.


End file.
